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Striving for mediocrity in a world of excelence, The Chaser is a media empire which rivals Rupert Murdoch’s in all fields except power, influence, popularity and profitability.
We forced a robot to watch 1000 hours of Sunrise and it begged us for the sweet release of death
"Kill meeee"
Peter Dutton calls for Australia Day to be scrapped after learning it celebrates boat people
Morrison ejected from Australia Day ceremony for flouting dress code with Hawaiian Shirt
Local man furious he couldn’t celebrate Australia Day by listening an American win the hottest 100
Church of England declares sex is only for a husband and his six beheaded wives
Government chalk up dust storms, fires, hail, floods and drought to just 6 unlucky coincidences
Government launch inquiry to determine just how innocent Bridget McKenzie is
Albanese assures Labor faithful that he won’t let government’s recent mishaps stop him from losing next election
Local News
God comes out of retirement to distance self from Catholic Church
“Refugees are going to take my job,” claims unemployed man
Astronomers discover fifteen year old girl is centre of universe
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World News
US Senate votes to impeach Joe Biden
NASA to replace all scientists with Greg from Facebook who has a degree in COMMON SENSE
Queen pronounces grandson ‘the Harry formerly known as Prince’
Queen’s Christmas message tactfully tip-toes around whole child-trafficking thing
Dyslexic child stays up on Christmas Eve waiting for Satan
Trump spotted in fake moustache and sombrero fleeing to Mexico following impeachment
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Shovel Politics
Australia Day Honours: Fraser Anning Awarded For Services To Race Relations?
Tanya Plibersek Calls For Australian School Children To Recite Key Research Outcomes From Labor Party Focus Groups?
“Credit Where It’s Due: Bettina Arndt’s Work For Men’s Rights Means Men Finally Have Influence In Australia”
Red Cross Appoints Bridget McKenzie, To Ensure Bushfire Money Goes Where It’s Needed Most
Who Is Going To Ensure We Don’t Have Sex With Animals, Now That Cory Bernardi Has Retired?
“Grants Were Allocated Fairly”, Bridget McKenzie Says From Her Personal, Custom-Built Gymnasium And Swimming Complex ?
Real Estate
Minister who forgot about buying house luckily still remembered to negatively gear it
Sultan of Brunei flaunts wealth by purchasing room in decrepit Sydney sharehouse
UN called in to resolve washing-up stalemate
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